‘The Targeter,’ a Surreal Novel, Chapter Twenty-One (Final Chapter)

Wow, that stinging I’ve been feeling on my left arm, under the elbow, on my right leg, just under my ass, and those two spots on my back, as well as all my other cuts and grazings on my neck and arm…it’s all hurting more and more…they’re sharper pains now.

My ketamine high must be finally wearing off.

Though I’m hurting more, and I don’t feel quite so stoned, I don’t feel more awake. As I lie here, prone on the road and soaked…in my blood?…I seem to be hovering between wakefulness and sleep.

Wait a minute…those weren’t large insects that smacked into me. I’m hearing more and more intense gunfire all around me. That pain I feel…those are bullets inside me!

Oh, my God. I’m going to die.

Estranged from my family, I’ve no way of contacting them. All of my foreigner friends have left the island, so I’ve no one to help me. Those Chinese men who were leading me to safety, I see them lying dead in pools of blood no different from my own growing pool of blood.

I’m dying, and no one is here to help me.

I’m getting light-headed. My K high is wearing off, but it hasn’t gone completely. My semi-conscious state, almost like hypnosis, is replacing my high, in keeping my mind in a dreamlike state…

BOOM! A huge explosion just rocked the area I’m lying in. It must have been close, for I just felt a shower of pebbles and dirt fall all over me. The flash of light from the explosion blinded me for the moment.

My whole body feels like it’s vibrating…I’m drifting off…

Wait!…No, that isn’t my blood all around me…it’s just my melted form again, merging with my surroundings…My surroundings are merging with me, too, all those pebbles, and that dirt…

Everything within me, and outside of me…we’re becoming ONE.

That pain I feel…it’s just the last remains of my suffering ego…as I merge with the Absolute…

I don’t want to lie like this, on my chest and stomach anymore…I’ll shift and lie on my left side…There’s that’s better.

I can barely keep my eyes open…Everything’s a blur in front of me…Sometimes flashes of light break up the darkness of the night…Some of the light is glowing…it seems like flames…Am I in Hell?

No, it can’t be Hell…I, Sid Arthur Gordimer, may be about to die, but as a saint and spreader of peace, love, and social justice, I’m leaving this world of pain and entering nirvana…Yes, that’s it!

I can hear the faint mumble of voices…people running by…Maybe some of them are staying here, by my side, wishing to help me and keep me company…how kind of them…They must be my surviving followers!

I should say something to them before I die…I have so little energy left…Can I think of the right way…to say it in Mandarin?…Let me see…

“All things,” I begin mumbling, in my surely broken, if not totally inarticulate, Chinese, “come to be…then they are no more…You must strive…to end the wars…help everyone…find peace of mind…feed, clothe, and house the poor…with all diligence.”

Was what I just said…at all intelligible?…I doubt it.

Whoa! Another blinding flash of light…with a deafening boom!…That was the closest explosion yet…More pebbles and dirt…are dropping on my body.

Everything’s black and silent…for the moment, at least.

Wait: a faint, but growing glow…and an indistinct hum…moaning, unintelligible sound…Getting clearer now…

Hey! Is that my father, the king?…I’m having a vision…

“Son,” he begins to say. “You are about to enter the realm of the Absolute. I must warn you, though: it won’t be pleasant at first. Recall the Unity of.Action, how all opposites are united and flow, each from one extreme to the other. These include Heaven and Hell, pleasure and pain, good and evil, love and hate, peace and war. To experience true nirvana, you must first endure the most excruciating of pain. To know the mastery of the biting head of the ouroboros, you must first know the pain of its bitten tail. Prepare yourself.”

“Yes, Father, I’m ready,” I say in a hoarse, weak voice that I can barely hear. He is showing me a father’s true love, for the first time in my life! This is so cathartic! Am I healing my wounds with my family? Is this the end of my estrangement from them?

“Also, remember the Unity of Space,” he continues. “In your union with the Absolute, you will also feel your ego merging with everything around you. It will be painful, but only insomuch as you are still attached to your separate state of existence. Allow your body to be scattered into an infinite amount of infinitesimal pieces, and you will feel minimal pain.”

“Yes, Father,” I say. “I’ll remember.”

“Sidney,” a familiar female voice rings in my ears.

“Is that my stepmother, reconciling herself with me?” I ask.

“No,” she says. “This is your mother, who never died. There is no stepmother. You imagined that. Stop splitting your living mother into good and bad halves. Accept me as one, with all my imperfections.”

“Yes, Mother,” I say. “Sorry.”

“Your life is done,” she says. “You wanted nirvana, so we as a family didn’t stand in your way. Before you enter it, we wanted to say goodbye to you. We all love you.”

“Thank you,” I say, teary-eyed. “I love you, too.”

“Goodbye, my husband,” Jessie says. “Raoul wants to say goodbye, too. See him waving to you?”

“Yes, I do,” I say, waving back to him. “Goodbye, my son.”

“Goodbye, Sid,” David says. “I’m sorry for all the fighting. I was in the wrong. I shouldn’t have been so envious.”

“Goodbye, David,” I say in sobs. “I’m sorry, too, that things ended so badly for you. I never meant you any harm.”

“It’s my fault,” he says. “I brought it all on myself.”

“The time has come, Son,” my father says. “Go in peace.”

Suddenly, a huge explosion blasts right in front of me, like a giant, fiery mushroom, burning my skin and blowing pieces of rock all over me. It stings with powerful blows on me, jerking me back a bit; but amazingly, I’m still lying in my reclining position, as if it had been only a gust of wind.

Still…I really feel…as though…the end…is near.

The end…not only for me,…but also…for all of the world.

I knew it all along…We’re all going to die.

My eyes…are barely open…I’m lying…limp…on the ground, but still…reclining…on my left side.

I’m looking up…into the night sky. Is that…a bomber plane…right above me? It’s so dark…Is something…dropping from it?…A black angel…coming down from…Heaven…to take me up…and carry me away…to paradise?

I’ve experienced…the flames of Hell…so now,…I should be going…from the one extreme…to the other…to Heaven.

Yes, that’s it!…Before the extreme light…of bliss,…I must be enveloped…in extreme black…like that black void…I swam into before…

The dropping black object…is getting closer…and closer…

Everything is…infinite black now…it’s just about here.

The black angel…is just upon me…almost touching…

Wow! Bright light everywhere, burning, scattering me all over the–


brass bluster of horns that accompanies pomp is foul,
obnoxious noise one should not have to endure in our

better than all others, by birth, colour, or sex. Why,
why must we hear fanfares that damage our fragile

one’s own horns is a blow to our eardrums, a
rupture, a goring, a piercing of a bull’s horns.

‘The Targeter,’ a Surreal Novel, Chapter Twenty

Hey, a whole bunch of shots were just fired!

Did I get hit by any of them? I don’t feel anything: my ketamine high is still keeping me desensitized to any pain. What about my comrades?

I’d better take a look around me; in my stoned stupor, I’m still pretty slow in my perception of anything. I’ll need a moment to process all of what’s just happened.

My friends aren’t standing beside me anymore…wait! Behind me…oh, shit! they’re lying behind me on the road, in a pool of blood. I guess I’ll never know where they were going to take me.

So, who were the shooters? David is gone, so his followers might as well join mine. If they’re joining me, whoever shot at us must be those fighting for the island’s ruling class.

I’ll look ahead to where the shots came from. In the distance, far down the road from here, I see a number of armed men in uniforms coming towards me. They must be from the ruling class’s army; I’ll bet some of them are private mercenaries, since such is the way the capitalism my comrades and I are fighting against does things these days–minimal government involvement and maximum privatization. I’ll bet they’ve already killed a thousand or so of my followers.

I may not have to fear David anymore, but these men coming at me are obviously trying to kill me and my followers. They’re trying to stop my movement of peace, love, and social transformation. If I wasn’t so high right now, I’d be terrified, frantically running away.

Speaking of running, one of those armed men is running at me now. He’s shot at me a few times, missing. I’d better turn around and go the other way.

I’m still so stoned, with so little feeling in my body, that I have no sense of my legs moving fast in running. Rather, I feel like I’m slowly floating; if anything, I’m just casually walking away from my pursuers.

Behind me, I hear them shouting something. Is it in Chinese, or English? “Ying gai shi ta!” (“It should be him!”), or, in English, “Engage the man!”? I’m not sure: there’s so much other noise–gunshots, explosions, and people screaming–that it’s hard to hear clearly. My being stoned out of my mind isn’t exactly helping, either, of course.

They shouted the same words again. Was it a man’s name? It sounded like “Angus LeMall.” That must be the name of the man chasing me. Yes, Angus LeMall, whoever that’s supposed to be, is coming after me, trying to kill me!

I’ll look behind again. Wow, the ferocity in his eyes! He looks like someone possessed of a demon, someone who’s killed nearly a thousand people, at least! And I’m to be his thousandth kill, it seems. I’d better keep my distance from him, though I don’t feel capable of going any faster that this slow walking…or floating…whatever my body is doing.

“Stop!” I hear him shout from not too far behind me.

“Why don’t you stop?” I say, then look behind. He seems much farther away from me than he should be; after all, he’s the one running, and I’m just walking. How can he still be so far away from me? Now, he’s stopping.

Is he going to repent of his murderous ways and join my peaceful cause? I hope so. A few more gunshots were just fired. I’m looking ahead, so I didn’t see who fired. I hope it wasn’t him. I just felt two light tapping sensations on my left arm, under the elbow, and on my right leg, just under my ass. It hurts a little, but only a little. I’m still so high from the K that I hardly feel much of anything.

To be safe and sure, I’ll send out my watery vibes of peace and love, to pacify my pursuers. That should ensure that Angus LeMall converts to my cause.

I seem to be lying on my chest on the road now. I’m melting into my watery form again. Indeed, I can see a dark liquid pouring out from my body to my left and right; it’s a dark liquid…is it red? No, it can’t be–it’s just my melted, watery form. The night, with a scarcity of street lamps at this part of the road, is what’s making my watery form only seem bloody. That’s it!

Yes, my watery vibes of peace and love are emanating from me and touching Angus and my other pursuers. They’re repenting and joining my cause now! Wonderful! Now that he is on my side, he’ll have to be patient and endure the bad karma he’s earned from having killed so many up until now. He’ll have to deal with the anger and curses of the grieving family and friends of all of those he’s killed over the years. It’s going to be hard for him; I hope he can handle it!

Anyway, I feel quite at rest here, lying prone on the road. I can see my dark liquid form flowing out in a lake…a red lake?…no, that can’t be!…all around me. This feels so peaceful.

Ketamine gives you such a powerful high!

What was that? A few more of those tapping sensations, this time, on my back. It stings a little. It must have been more flying insects crashing into me.

I hope the bugs aren’t too badly hurt.


of innate
and effort.
They have
earned their
godlike glory.

all of us
they are
seekers of an
unearned glory.

to us as
if they were
gibberish from
distant, foreign
lands. To listen to
them is to be deaf.

but they’d
best beware
of falling from
so far a height as
to crash on the land,
bore a hole into it, and
end up in the lowest hell.

‘The Targeter,’ a Surreal Novel, Chapter Nineteen

Whoa! Something else just shot by me, like the insect last time, only this time it touched me–it scratched past my right arm. If that was a flying insect speeding by, it was a big one.

I’d better check my arm…hey, blood! It cut a hole in my shirt sleeve, and there’s a cut on my arm. No insect would do that. Was it a bullet?

My ongoing ketamine high is still desensitizing me to pain. I’d really be groaning if I was sober. The blood is really staining my sleeve.

More gunshots, just over my head, about three of them! I’m too stoned to be scared, but my comrades, these Chinese who’ve helped me cross the road from the park with the temple on the other side, they sure look scared! Where are they taking me?

I feel like I’m here and not here at the same time…or here one moment, and elsewhere at another, for example, floating in the sky, or swimming in the ocean. I sense that I’m in danger, but it feels like a dream I’ll wake up from soon enough.

Another gunshot flew by! I felt it touch my neck, on the left side, a slight grazing. Let me check: yes, more blood on my hand where I touched the grazing. I, the targeter for a world of peace, love, and social justice, am the targeted by these warmongers!

Who are they? I’m so wasted that it’s hard to think straight. I’m trying to focus on the action I see on the streets, as my comrades are taking me God knows where. Soldiers in uniforms are running up and down the street, firing at each other. I see a few tanks, also. Whoa!…a boom and a flash of light in the night sky!

Who are these people? I’m trying, in the midst of my peaking high (recall that pill I took in the park…it’s really adding to the mix, whatever it was…ecstasy? Who knows.), to remember the earlier events of this night leading up to now. My brain is floating in the air one moment, swimming in an ocean of stonedness the next.

Needing a moment to remember my Mandarin…OK, I’ll ask these guys with me. “What’s happening? Who’s shooting at us?”

One of them says, “Dawei…” something. It’s hard to hear clearly over all the shooting and explosions all around us. Being on drugs doesn’t make interpreting Chinese any easier, either, of course. I’ll need a moment…what is ‘dawei’ in English? Is it ‘captain’? Is it ‘the great one’?

Wait! ‘Dawei’ is David! Yes, that’s it! My cousin David has his followers, who are coming after me. My followers defeated his for a while, but now they’ve regrouped, and are making a fresh attack!

My followers, who have also grown in number, are trying their best to repel his followers, but his followers are growing in number, too, and perhaps are setting up more and more rival organizations to stop mine. David is relentless! He’s probably aiding the ruling class to stop us and grab power for himself.

These people shooting at me were probably sent by David to assassinate me! Yes, that’s it! If he has me killed, my movement will be decapitated, and then he can take over. That’s his plan!

Wait! Something just flew by me, something really big. It made a huge, roaring sound, like an engine, as it went by. What was it? I’ll look back and see.

Nothing there. My comrades are really hurrying me to wherever they want me to be. Somewhere safe, I assume. Oh, my sometimes floating, sometimes swimming mind….

I hear that roaring sound coming back from behind. I’ll look back: it’s hard to see in the dark, especially when you’re high on K.

Another explosion in the sky has caused a flash of light, and I saw something coming at me, just higher than my head. Was it some kind of helicopter, flying low, with gunners trying to shoot at me? More gunshots are flying past, coming very close to my body, but not hitting me.

Yet another flash of light in the sky has illuminated the approaching thing, which looks greyish and big.

Wait…an elephant? Has David sent a roaring elephant to chase and trample me? That’s it!

Whoa!…my comrades and I are dodging the elephant as it runs by. That was a close one!

I’ll hold out my hand and send out some vibrations of peace and love to calm the elephant. There…sending out some good vibes. It’s turning around, ready to come back at me. Hey, another explosion and flash of light in the sky, right by the elephant! It has fallen on the road, many yards in front of my comrades and me. My vibes seem to have pacified the animal, which is now lying on the road, peacefully asleep. Good.

Now I see a man running up to me, with an angry look. Hey, he’s white! What does he want? If I get a chance to talk to him, I can just use English. He’s dressed in a military uniform. Is he an American?

I need to blink my eyes a few times to focus and see him better. My comrades are shouting at him, trying to say something in very broken English, hard to understand, but it sounds hostile: “You! Go away! No hit us!” is as much as I can make out in my wasted state.

What does the white man have in his hand–an axe? Since when do soldiers carry axes? He’s getting closer. I can see his face more clearly now…it’s David! He’s come to kill me!

One of my followers, those men who’ve been escorting me to safety, has come to my defence. He’s struggling with David, trying to stop him from hitting me with the axe (or is it an ice-pick?).

David is proving himself stronger, and he’s overpowering my friend. Oh, no! David just cracked the guy’s skull open with the axe, and there’s blood all over the place; but one of my other comrades is moving in on David. He just kicked David in the gut.

The axe has fallen out of David’s hand. My friend just picked it up. Whoa! He just hit David in the side of the head with the axe…or ice pick. I’m so stoned that I can’t see clearly in the dark. All I see is David’s corpse on the side of the road, with his blood flowing into a nearby gutter.

BOOM! Another explosion just flashed a bright light in the sky and has shaken the ground under my feet. At least, I think that’s what just happened. I see that hole in the ground where David’s blood is flowing. Is it the gutter, or…is it a crack in the ground, from the earthquake?

Yes, that’s it! A huge black crack in the earth, just opened into a hole…and down goes David’s body into that hole, him and all the blood that was flowing into it before. The earth just opened up and swallowed him!

With his rival movement just decapitated, as it had tried to decapitate mine, his followers can now join mine. We can now move forward in unity and solidarity, to defeat the island’s ruling class, end this war, and establish social and economic justice!

I see good times ahead.

Whoa! More gunfire!

It’s a good thing I ducked in time.


When will the third of the Fates
snip the cord of my life?
How will she do it,
and where?
Will I go gently, or
will I scream in a panic?
Will it be quick, or drawn out?

Will the
snipping cut me up,
leaving my blood in a splash,
staining my clothes and surroundings,
or will it be painless, me not
knowing it happened
at all?

And what of the fate of the world?
will it end with a bang,
or a whimper?
Will the
scissors snip
with a piercing clack,
or with an unnoticed smoothness?

All I know
is that her scissors
are right by the thin string.
The blades surround it, and they
are ready to close and cut.
The string trembles
in terror.

‘The Targeter,’ a Surreal Novel, Chapter Eighteen

Having pulled back all the water of my melted body, made it coagulate, and concentrated it so it would again form the shape of my human body, I’ve returned from across the ocean, all of me back on this island, and I’m opening my eyes. Indeed, now I not only hear, but also see, all the explosions and gunfire.

And yes, they’re even closer than ever before.

I see soldiers running up and down the street, here in front of the park and the temple where I was given that pill that seems to be augmenting my ketamine high. The soldiers, sometimes in one uniform (PLA, I think), and sometimes in another (the local army, it must be), are firing their rifles. I see two or three of them shot, falling on the road, bleeding and groaning in pain.

My eyes being a little out of focus, I’ve blinked them a few times, hoping to see more clearly. BOOM! BOOM! A few loud explosions just startled me with their flashing, blinding light in the sky. My eyes need to adjust some more to these shocks.

…and…OK, I think I know what’s going on.

Now that my movement for peace and a revolutionary overthrow of the warmongering ruling class is gaining ground, as I saw in the soldiers of the first uniform running down the street and shooting at the army of the ruling class, there have arisen others, also in uniform (the same uniform, I think), who are trying to sabotage my movement. Their traitorous actions have caused the injuries to the soldiers I see over there, my followers, lying and bleeding on the road.

This all must be David’s doing. He said before that he wants to take over my movement and ‘improve’ it, since he envies me for the love I’ve received from my comrades and growing number of followers.

Yes, David is trying to infiltrate my movement for peace and radical change, that’s what all the fighting is about! My followers, at heart, don’t want war, but David is forcing them to fight in self-defence, to discredit all that we’re struggling for!

He’s stirring up trouble in an attempt to replace me as leader. He’s sent in agent provocateurs to start fights among my followers. He has gangs and wreckers trying to break us up! We must stop him and thwart his schemes!

Is that what that white man was doing before, the one who came up to me to have me leave the island and go back home across the ocean…so David could take over?

Yes, that must have been it! Oh, it’s a good thing that I decided to stay here and send my energy over there, in watery form. Still, David is coming to get me!

BOOM! Wow, another explosion just lit up the sky and pounded on my eardrums! It was really close! Was that from David’s forces? It must have been. I think I feel…is that flaky fragments of things falling on my head and shoulders…is that ash and fragments of stone? It feels like that.

Hey, some people are coming up to me. They must be some of my new followers, for though I don’t recognize them, they are wiping the ash and tiny pieces of rock off of my clothes–how thoughtful of them. What are they saying to me? I’ll have to focus my stoned brain on their rapidly-flying Mandarin words.

“Come with us,” one of them is saying, “to a safer place…too dangerous here…Let’s go together.”

“Yes,” I say in Chinese as I get up. “Tell those soldiers on the road…to stop fighting with each other. That’s what David wants them to do. Don’t listen to David’s lies.”

As they’re taking me out of the park, I hear more gunshots, really loud ones, quite close to us. One of the men taking me has fallen back: was he shot? I’m still so high that I cannot tell.

“No more fighting!” I shout out as loud as I can to all my followers on the road. I hope my voice was loud enough to be heard over all the shooting and explosions in the sky; I also hope that my Mandarin is intelligible to them. “Stay unified! Let there be no divisions in our movement! Don’t follow David!”

“We don’t understand…[something, unclear],” one of my followers–who are helping me cross the street now–is saying. Don’t understand what? Is my drunken, stoned voice too slurred? Am I making mistakes with my Chinese? Let me attempt to piece together the unclear fragments of what I remember hearing of his Chinese: “…you..in…say…what”? No, was it, “You…again…say…what…need…hear”, or “need…stop”? Was that it?

Speaking of stopping, I’m so high, at the moment, I’m not sure if I’m walking or staying in one place.

Oh, wait! I know what he said. “We’ve stopped. No more fighting. We understand. You’ve again said what we need to hear.” That’s it! My followers aren’t being lured over to David’s side. I’ve gotten through to them. They are staying unified, no sectarian splitting of the movement. The disputes are now resolved, and my enemies–those working for David–have been defeated, kicked out of the movement, expelled, or…I’m sorry to say…killed.

The movement is safe and intact…for now, at least.

I’m on the other side of the road from the park. Where are my followers taking me?

Hey! Something just shot by my ear, fast as a bullet. It almost grazed my ear.

It flew by at lightning speed, with a loud, buzzing sound.

It must have been an insect.

I’m glad it didn’t hit me. That would have hurt.

‘The Targeter,’ a Surreal Novel, Chapter Seventeen

Some people, my followers, surely, are taking me somewhere. I’m walking with them on that sidewalk, from where I was, in front of my apartment building, to wherever they’re taking me.

We’ve crossed an intersection, and we’re continuing our walk down the side of the road. I see a tank rolling along in front of me, with soldiers running near it.

I just heard another explosion, with a flash of light overhead. The machine gun fire is louder than before, as if we’re getting closer to the action.

Oh, I see. These people are taking me into a park where there’s one of those Chinese temples. A man is there, grinning and greeting me with a bow and a handshake. What are my followers planning to do for me?

They’ve had me sit at a bench by the front of the temple. I vaguely sense them rubbing my arms, shoulders, and back, as if treating wounds. Remember that my ketamine high is still strong, desensitizing and disorienting me.

The man is saying something to me. My listening comprehension of Mandarin is limited enough as it is; imagine how difficult it must be when a non-native speaker like me is drunk and stoned out of his mind!

I’m trying to make out what he’s saying: “Give you…eat medicine” (Gei nichr yao)?…or…”Give you…temple” (Gei ni…sz miao)? Oh, that’s it! One of my new followers is donating this temple and park to me and the members of my spiritual, political movement! How thoughtful and generous of him!

“Thank you!” I say to him in slurred Chinese, shaking his hand again. This gift must be in thanks for my having just tamed that giant snake back there.

The man has a little blue pill in one hand and a small paper cup of water in the other. He wants me to take the pill. Is it ecstasy? Is he helping me intensify my high? I hope so, for I feel great! I’m swallowing down the pill and water in eager anticipation.

Those people who were rubbing me are now wrapping…bandages?…around my arms. No, not bandages–glowing, golden robes, Oriental robes! More gifts in thanks for saving them from the snake–more gifts to honour me!

Hey, who’s that striding over to me in such a hurry? That’s no Asian…it’s a white man in his mid-twenties, I’d say. What does he want with me?

“Hey, buddy,” he says (Did he say ‘buddy,’ or ‘Buddha’?) It’s good to hear English for a change, instead of having to struggle to understand Chinese. “What are you doing here? What country are you from?” (I think that’s what he said.)

“I’m from India,” I think I’ve said. He’s looking at me with a sneer of incredulity and confusion.

“Are you high?” he asks (I think.). “I’m trying to get all foreigners off the island and back to safety. It’s the only reason I’m still here, as crazy as my remaining here is. Your family must be worried about you, and will want you to go back to them. Let me help you do that.”

…at least I think that’s what he said…did he? No, that can’t be right. I’m much too estranged from all the people of the Sakia Corporation for any of them to care about me enough to try to find me here and get me away from this hellhole of a war zone.

He must have said something else. What could it be? Let me think…

Oh, I know! My father and stepmother, the king and queen of Sakia, along with my wife and son, and my cousin, all want me to go back to the palace to convert them to the New Way. They, too, want to be my followers! They no longer want to sell weapons! How wonderful!

But I cannot abandon my followers here. They need me to help them transform this island from one of war to one of peace. Instead of taking an airplane back there, I’ll just stay here physically, and I’ll use my power to send my energy, my vibrations of peace and love, all the way across the ocean so the family can receive them and be enlightened. I’ll have to concentrate with particular intensity.

OK, I’ve closed my eyes and I’m focusing. I can feel the vibes flowing in me, through me, and outside of me. It’s so soothing, so peaceful.

Oh, now I can feel myself melting into water again. My body-as-water is projecting outwards in a growing circle, soaking all of my surroundings and all those people around me, including the man who gave me the pill (Is it kicking in now? I am really high!) and the white man who wanted me to leave this island and see my royal family in the palace on the other side of the ocean. As everyone here is soaked in my water, he or she is blessed with vibrations of peace and love.

“Oh, forget it,” I hear someone say–the white man, presumably. “Junkie.” I hear footsteps going away from me.

Did he say that, or did he say something else? No, he said, “Oh, forgive sin, Jain king.” That’s it! He’s received my blessings, and he’s expressed his appreciation! Now he’s leaving to help me find more followers!

My water is now expanding further. It’s reached the shore of the island and is now merging with the ocean. Yes, now I’m at one with the ocean, filling it with love and enlightenment, and I’m reaching the coast on the other side, on the mainland where the king and queen live.

My water is flowing onto the land there now, inching closer and closer to the palace. Everyone who is on the land, in my path on my way to the palace, is getting soaked by me and is receiving my blessings.

Finally, I’ve reached the palace! I’m soaking its outer walls, going in through the opened windows, and soaking the interior. I can feel the nearby presence of my father and stepmother, my wife and son, and my cousin. They will receive my goodness soon.

Yes, they are now being splashed with it! I can feel their blooming bliss as they get soaked!

I can hear their voices, voices of love.

“Yes, my son, I understand now,” my father is saying. “I understand that profiting off of war is wrong. I should not be making money off of the suffering of others. I’ll dissolve Sakia and invest in your movement. The cause of peace and provision for the poor is the right one.”

“Forgive me, Sid Arthur,” the queen, my stepmother, is saying. “I mistreated you when you were a child. I wasn’t loving to you. Now I understand my wrongdoing. I wish to make amends.”

“You were right to leave us and use your power to help the world,” my wife, Jessie, says, holding our son, Raoul, who is beaming at me with love in his eyes. “Now we can share your blessings with everyone else.”

“Thank you for helping me to see the error of my envious ways, Sid,” my cousin, David, says. “I will join your movement. I must say, though, that your methods of leadership could use some improvement. I believe that I can lead your movement more effectively. Please allow me to have the chance to demonstrate my superior abilities.”


I can faintly hear more explosions and gunfire. They feel closer than ever. I’d better return to my human form on the island.


to hell
might be
paved with
noble intents,

such a
way may
have tar as
black as evil,
leading to worse.

go on
the ‘left’
lane or to
go along the
right won’t make

big a
of where
we’ll go, on
the same road.

a dead end,
off a high cliff.

at the
top are
taking us
to our doom.

down an
while we can.